• Venues
    • Search by county
      • London
      • Essex
      • Kent
      • Surrey
      • Cheshire
      • South Wales
    • Search by town
      • Manchester
      • Edinburgh
      • Bristol
      • Birmingham
      • Leeds
      • Cardiff
    • Venue types
      • Asian
      • Barn
      • Castle
      • Country house
      • Hotel
      • Outdoor
      • Pub
      • LGBTQ+
      • Sport
      • Unusual
      • Waterside
  • Suppliers
    • Supplier types
      • Bridalwear
      • Catering
      • Childcare
      • Cakes & sweet treats
      • Design & Decoration
      • Entertainment
      • Florists
      • Hair & Beauty
      • Lighting
      • Cars & transport
      • Marquees & tent hire
      • Music
      • Photographer
      • Planners
      • Stationery
      • Toastmaster
      • Videographer
      • Celebrant
  • Offers
  • Wedding Ideas
  • Events
  • Date Checker

12 Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves

Author: Hollie Bond

NB: To help you browse our best suggestions we have included some third party links. Some purchases made through these links may earn us a commission to help keep our blogs and offers current and up to date. Thanks for your support!

Feeling anxious as well as excited in the run-up to your wedding day? While that’s totally normal don’t let it spoil your planning fun with our top tips for calming your wedding nerves.

Planning your wedding should be full of fun and excitement, but it’s also completely natural to have some pre wedding anxiety during this time. You might be putting a lot of pressure on yourself to make sure you pull off the perfect wedding. Perhaps making lots of big decisions and spending lots of money is making you feel stressed? Or maybe your family members and friends are overwhelming you with their opinions or creating problems when it comes to bridesmaids dresses and the guest list. It might just be something as simple as freaking out about everyone watching you walking down the aisle or worrying that no one turns up!

Whatever is causing you to have pre wedding jitters though, it’s important to remember this is absolutely normal and something that many brides and grooms experience. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re getting cold feet or shouldn’t be getting married. However, you don’t want to look back on your wedding planning journey and regret the negative feelings and wedding day anxiety, so let’s get to work on banishing those pre wedding nerves with these top tips to reduce wedding stress.

1. Share the burden

Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves James Lisa 1024x684 1

A lot of people who suffer from wedding anxiety during the wedding planning process are brides and grooms who struggle to delegate and like to be in control. Of course, you’ve been dreaming about your wedding day for years, if not decades, so it can be difficult to let go and entrust any details to other people, but allowing family members, your spouse to be, suppliers and close friends to get involved and take the lead on certain projects for you will really help reduce any wedding related anxiety.

You can still be in charge of telling them what you want and how to do it, but physically handing over some of the many tasks will feel like a weight has gone from around your shoulders and will allow you to focus on the parts of the wedding day that you really want to organise yourself.

2. Don't compare your wedding

Social anxiety – the need to make sure your wedding looks amazing on instagram or that it’s just as good as, if not better than your friend’s or sibling’s wedding – can be a huge factor in why a lot of brides feel stressed or nervous in the run up to the big day. It’s not easy to just get over this feeling of fear that people will judge your wedding, but one way to help you to reduce stress is to talk to your other half about your dreams for your big party and remember what makes you special as a couple.

If you’re in a stress spiral about your wedding, sit down and try and remember your original big day dreams when you first got engaged – how you want it to feel, what’s important to you (and what’s not), and that it’s essentially all about marrying the person you love. Remember that if you focus on these things rather than trying to outshine other weddings, then you’ll have the best time ever because it will be unique to you as a couple.

3. Be organised

Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves Be Organised 2

Wedding planning is one of those things that you simply can’t leave to the last minute. So, it’s time for a moment of self awareness – if you know you’re a top procrastinator, you need to give the to-do list to your other half or a family member who can keep you in check. If possible, give yourself plenty of time to plan, and tick off all the big ticket items and key details months in advance. Of course, there are always going to be last minute details that need sorting, such as the table plan and some of the decor, so ensure you’ve got a good team on hand to help you with these too.

4. Have a Plan B

So you’ve found a venue with a glorious country garden ceremony space and it’s your dream to get married there. Dreams meet reality: even in the warmest countries it rains sometimes and in the UK it can rain a lot. While you should still plan for your dream outdoor wedding, it’s important not to have your heart 100% set on only saying “I do” in this specific setting. To avoid giving yourself major wedding anxiety and finding yourself checking the weather forecast every few seconds in the run up to your wedding it’s sensible to have a Plan B – a wet weather plan.

This doesn’t just apply to the weather. Any elements of your wedding that could be affected by things outside of your control need to have a Plan B in place to help you feel calm and in control of your wedding day.

5. Eat well

Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves Eat Well 3

Look after your body and your mind will follow. There’s no denying wedding planning can be intense. If you’re trying to fit it in alongside a full time job it can feel overwhelming with a lot of admin, spreadsheets and emails to keep on top of. With so much to do and not enough hours in the day to do it all simple things like eating properly can easily get forgotten. Spending time looking after yourself in the lead up to your wedding is really important as you want to look and feel your very best when you take to the aisle. Be sure to make time to cook a healthy meal each night and get your five a day.

You could also incorporate some anxiety-reducing foods into your diet for good measure. For example, dark chocolate contains antioxidants and minerals that help to improve brain function, while green tea or herbal teas containing lavender and chamomile have been found to help reduce anxiety. Other foods that are believed to have stress-busting qualities include fish, avocado, whole grains, milk, nuts and citrus fruits. And, it goes without saying, that you’ll need to eat a healthy breakfast on the wedding morning before you even think about having that first glass of Champagne! It’s worth asking a bridesmaid to keep some sugary snacks to hand to keep your blood sugar up too, as nerves can make you feel jittery and shaky.

6. Do some exercise

It’s no secret that exercise helps the body in many ways, but especially when you have a build-up of emotions. When the wedding nerves or anxiety hits, take yourself away from the situation by going for a run, swim or cycle or booking into a gym class. Yoga and pilates are also a really good way to destress. By focussing on something else you’re removing yourself from the stress, plus exercise helps the body release endorphins, the feel-good hormones, that’ll get you back into a positive mindset when it comes to your wedding.

7. Get a good night's sleep

Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves Sleep 4

Alongside a good diet and regular exercise, the other important piece of self care you need to focus on if you’re suffering from wedding day anxiety is your sleep. When you’re exhausted you aren’t able to handle emotions as well and so any worries you have will bubble up to the surface and could seriously affect your mental health. The most important night to get sleep is the night before the big day. Don’t be tempted to party into the small hours – not only will you look and feel bad in the morning, but any wedding anxiety will be much worse if you’re fatigued.

8. Spend time together as a couple

With so much to organise you might find that suddenly you’re not spending much time together as a couple in the run up to the wedding. A wedding day is all about celebrating your love though, so it’s hugely important to make sure you are together and enjoying every moment of excitement before you say your vows. Having your spouse to be by your side in those last few weeks and days will help alleviate any nerves as he or she will be a constant reminder as to why you’re planning the wedding in the first place – because you love them!

9. Take time away from wedding planning

Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves Time Away 5

As well as spending time together on the wedding planning, it’s a good idea to just forget about all the decisions, tastings, dress fittings and guest lists for a while and do some of your favourite activities together. Not only will this help reduce wedding day anxiety, it will also help you to adjust back to normal life easily after the wedding. Lots of couples who become so caught up in the planning feel very low or blue after the big day as they’ve forgotten what to do with themselves without a wedding to plan!

10. Breathe deeply

When you breathe deeply you increase the supply of oxygen to your brain, which triggers it to produce a feeling of calmness throughout your body. At any point before or during your wedding that makes you feel nervous or like you’re going to have a panic attack, take a moment alone and practice mindfulness meditation and breathing deeply and you might be amazed at how much it helps. Trigger points to use this deep breath technique before include moments when you’re the centre of attention like the vows, the first dance, and the speeches.

11. Consider hiring a wedding planner or on the day co-ordinator

Some people just don’t have the time or the inclination to deal with planning a wedding. And if that’s you then do not worry. Not everyone finds choosing colour schemes and going to bridal boutiques fun. If all the decisions and research involved makes you feel stressed then consider hiring an expert who can take on some of these jobs for you. A wedding planner can help edit down choices for you and will be on hand to organise suppliers and deal with a lot of the questions. If your budget doesn’t stretch to a full planning service, you might want to opt for an on-the-day co-ordinator who will ensure everything runs smoothly with all your suppliers and the running order so you can concentrate on getting married and enjoying the wedding celebrations.

12. Focus on your partner

Tips to Help You Calm your Wedding Nerves Partner 6

Don’t sweat the small stuff. No one will notice if there’s a missing charger plate on the top table, or if you didn’t manage to make enough confetti cones for each guest. At the end of the day remember this – all the tiny details don’t matter. As long as both you and your bride or groom are there and you love each other that’s all that matters. When you walk down the aisle or have any moments of anxiety throughout the day, just look at or hold hands with your new spouse and any stress should disappear as your remember that you’ve got the rest of your married life to look forward to together.


Written by

Hollie Bond

Hollie is a lifestyle journalist with over ten years’ experience working in the wedding industry as Lifestyle Editor for You & Your Wedding magazine Also a Regional Editor for Muddy Stilettos, Hollie has written for Square Meal magazine, Family History Monthly, BBC History magazine and Homes & Antiques. In her spare time you can find Hollie in a dance studio practising ballet…

Learn more about Hollie Bond